Different houses, different habits: Screen time and co-parenting

Parenting after a divorce can be difficult. My ex-husband and I don’t always agree on how to teach our children good habits. Even when we do agree, small differences in how we guide and discipline our kids can make it difficult for them to adjust.

Managing screen time is one of our biggest challenges. When my kids are with me, they are limited to one hour per day on their smartphones. Before they reach a full hour, I help them find other activities to keep them off their phones. We have a cabinet of family board games, tubs of backyard toys, and buckets of arts and crafts supplies, and if those don’t work, I remind them of their chores. They still spend more time laughing at memes than picking up their dirty clothes, but it’s a start.

At dad’s house, on the other hand, the rules are different. On some days, our kids get no phone time. On other days, they have YouTube marathons or play games on their phone until they can’t see straight.

The whole point of these rules is to help them form good habits, but forming new habits (or breaking bad ones) takes time, and that’s exactly what I don’t have. Just as they get used to one set of rules, it’s time for them to switch from one house to another. When they first arrive from dad’s house, they have a tendency to dive into smartphone marathons, and breaking them away is an uphill battle.

What can I do to help them adjust to the steady daily phone limits at my house after they have, once again, gotten used to all-or-nothing phone habits at dad’s house?

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